


life did not find us in this lifetime.

by Prettything_uglylie



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Compliant, Dead Allison Argent, Grief/Mourning, Lost Love, M/M, Missing Scene, Past Allison Argent/Scott McCall
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-26
Updated: 2020-07-26
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:14:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25531918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Prettything_uglylie/pseuds/Prettything_uglylie
Summary: “So you’re just going to leave?” Scott asks and it falls into the air between them. The air is thick with grief and nothing was right. Allison Argent was dead and there was the fear that they would all follow and that they would never come back to the surface after this tragedy.
Relationships: Isaac Lahey/Scott McCall
Comments: 12
Kudos: 32





	life did not find us in this lifetime.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sunarists](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunarists/gifts).



> me: i love sadie and she deserves lovely things!!  
> also me: let me,,,, write angst for her? 
> 
> anyways, sadie, i hope you like this and i love you!

“So you’re just going to leave?” Scott asks and it falls into the air between them. The air is thick with grief and nothing was right. Allison Argent was dead and there was the fear that they would all follow and that they would never come back to the surface after this tragedy. 

But they were not alone in their grief. Stiles had lost parts of himself to the Nogitsune and they were all losing sleep but Scott and Isaac had found a similarity in their grief of Allison - they both had loved her and whether or not Scott found himself conflicted in the idea of Isaac loving Allison as he had loved her or of Isaac loving Allison as he had loved Isaac. It was a bizarre feeling, the idea that he had loved both of them so much - maybe, maybe if he is honest with himself, he loved them the same amount in the same way and in the same timespan and he never questioned if he couldn’t love them both. He was losing them both though, and it didn’t matter. 

It didn’t matter and that was the worst part. It didn’t matter because when the tears dried and everyone found themselves a new vice, Isaac could be forgotten as easily as Erica, as easily as Boyd, as easily as he can see them forgetting Allison. 

It makes him nauseaous. 

Isaac is sitting beside him, long legs drapped over the white cool ceramic of the freezer in Scott’s basement and shoulders hunched into him - Scott forgets how tall Isaac is sometimes, by all the time he spends curled over himself and sometimes it makes him sick when he realizes that Isaac’s submission is practiced from years of his father - but his blue eyes are wet and he glances away every few minutes as though refusing the urge to cry. 

The irony of them sitting on a freezer that had been used to contain Isaac just as he’s about to get freedom is not lost on him, he’s hyperaware of it, like Stiles is purposefully slipping him notes on how to get through it but when those notes pile up, he finds himself now not knowing how to provide the same feeling for Stiles. 

“I am.” He admits softly and his voice carries a broken rasp that settles in Scott’s veins and makes a home for itself there. There’s no anger actually in Scott and anything that masks itself as anger falls flat and the strings of the mask have fallen. He isn’t left with the angry burn of fire, no, he aims for it because at least it would drown out this broken grief but it falls flat and he is left in the ashes of everything he has ever loved. 

Isaac is another thing he has loved and while he is broken - absolutely damaged, Isaac had packed a bag at night to save him the full wreckage but he will think about it staring at his roof and not daring to call out for help because they’re all drowning right now - and distraught, a strange tick in his broken heart is grateful. Isaac will move away and he will find himself a beautiful place to live and life will almost be good enough for Isaac Lahey but will still fall flat because no one and nothing deserves him, but - but he will live. He will get to walk away from this and find himself a good place to be and Scott will wander this new world sodden in ashes until his feet ache and his world seems alright enough to keep going. Isaac will move on and Scott hopes he does but the consequence of not admitting he loves him is louder here than ever. 

Isaac’s stuff is packed in a box (  _ a  _ box, just the one - Scott had been amazed at it really but he assumes it’s from years of being the only survivor left standing) and they’re waiting for Chris Argent’s car to pull in the driveway and take Isaac to  _ FranceEnglandMorracoCanadaSomehwerefarawaythatScott’sMomwouldhaveaheartattackifhetriedtofollow  _ and Scott is deafened by the urge to kiss one of his best friends. 

He wishes it was the first time. 

“I have to,” Isaac starts again softly and Scott forgets what he asked, forgets where time started, forgets his own name, forgets, forgets,  _ forgets,  _ “We...I don’t have anything left here anymore.” 

It’s technically true. It’s technically true in the analytical cold way that Scott loathes whenever Stiles or Lydia or Allison had taken it but knows is right. His  _ real  _ pack is all dead - he wonders when he started to consider Erica and Boyd as simply other losses - and Derek has pushed him away out of the fear of caring for people and Allison is dead. But it isn’t...it isn’t all the way true. 

He says it without thinking, “You have me.” 

And he is back at Deaton’s, Isaac standing before him for the first time not clad in Derek’s leather jacket and just rawly Isaac and before a fluffy white dog named Rosco that had caused him to text Stiles, _We have a dog here trying to steal your Jeep’s name_ and Stiles had texted back _If you send me a pic and he’s cute enough, he can have it_ and everything had been light and beautiful and they were _sixteen_ and untouched by true darkness. 

He is back in the moment of Isaac admitting, “ _ I guess that makes me lucky because I don’t have anyone.”  _ and he had found himself stuck by that but not terribly surprised - one day Isaac was on their lacrosse team and walking the halls and hiding in plain sight and the next, he was wanted for murder and wearing Derek’s leather jacket proudly; it had seemed like no one had noticed when the quiet and timid boy had went missing to be replaced with the Isaac Lahey he knows now. 

He doesn’t blame them - he hadn’t noticed the other Isaac either. 

Isaac’s spine stiffens and he rolls his shoulder but Scott can smell the air grow distressed and sad as he thinks he recognizes a sob wrack his chest but doesn’t escape his throat. His voice is quiet enough to get lost in the ashes but louder than a bomb, “But I can’t...Not now.” 

It makes too much sense. They don’t have any time anymore and they don’t have any love left, only grief and pain and something broken down that could be called the closest thing to love you can make from ashes. 

Love didn’t find them properly, not here. Not now. Not in this lifetime. 

Scott’s voice is simply broken, “I know.” 

It’s the cold analytical voice he hates so much but it provides a comfort, like Stiles’ reading voice or Lydia’s statistics. It’s cold like ice, like the garage floor neither of their feet are touching right now or like the freezer they are sitting on. 

Even Isaac’s soft plush lips pressing into his feels cold, feels like a lack of love and feels like a goodbye, like the last roll of breath is coursing through his broken, punctured lungs and in that moment, Isaac has taken away his dying breath with that kiss. 

Scott thinks he’d gladly give it to him. 

Argent’s car pulls in and Isaac pulls away and pulls away and  _ pulls away _ and never comes home again. Scott pretends he doesn’t miss him, even on nights where his mouth tastes like ashes. 

**Author's Note:**

> This is one of my first Teen Wolf fics in awhile and I am almost tempted to write for the fandom again tbh! It's just been awhile lol!
> 
> Anyways, I hope this was liked!


End file.
